Spring Break: End of the Road Trip

We made it safely home. The boys are with their mom now. I miss them already--it's a big adjustment after being in close quarters with them for a week.

The drive was uneventful in a good way. There was really light snow off and on at times through South Dakota. It had been almost 70 when we went out--and it's supposed to be in the 70s again this weekend--but most of our time was cold--at least at night. We played a few rounds of finding the alphabet in order on road signs. We ended up with 41 state license plates, 4 provinces, 1 Native American tribe (Cherokee from Oklahoma) and some US Government plates. We thought that all but 9 states was pretty good in a trip just across one state. We even saw at least 4 Alaska plates (but no Hawaii). I had the boys work on their math as we went by figuring out what percentage of the states we had found (ended up with 82% as they can tell you). We also ended up seeing a total of 162 different Wall Drug signs (99 on the way out along Interstate 90 from Worthington, Minnesota, to Wall, South Dakota, and 63 heading back east from Summerset to Wall).

All in all, despite colder weather that only allowed us one night in our tent, we had a great trip. I hope to return to do some more intense hiking some day. The landscape is beautiful, from rugged mountains to forests to grasslands. Saw a lot of wildlife we don't see here (bison, pronghorns, prairie dogs, mule deer, mountain goats, bighorn sheep--we saw all the large mammals except mountain lions and elk). And most importantly we had fun together as a family.

Spring Break Wandering Day 3

We survived a chilly night, but it wasn't that bad when we awoke. Still, the park ranger seemed skeptical that the boys would do well sleeping in a tent tonight with a winter storm coming through and I decided she was right, so we packed up camp this morning. We drove north through Custer toward Mt. Rushmore. Three tunnels along the road perfectly framed the four presidents in each. There were also three pigtail turns on the road.

We arrived at Rushmore and added a few more states to our list of license plates we've seen along the trip. Mountain goats awaited us within the park.

As we left we weren't sure where we'd spend the night do we just drove and made stops to climb rock formations and watch wildlife (I saw a marmot but was too slow for a photo).

We ended up in the town of Hot Springs for the night. After some bison burgers we walked along the historic downtown, sampling mineral water from springs.

Spring Break Adventure Day 2

We left our cheap but cozy (and with a hot homemade breakfast) motel and traveled on to Custer State Park. On the way we saw 68 more signs for Wall Drug for a total of 99 along I-90. We added a couple more states to our list of license plates we've seen as well as another province.

We had a lovely day. The weather nearest 70 degrees and we planned to enjoy the outdoors as much as possible. We drove the Wildlife Loop, taking in pronghorns, mule deer, bison and prairie dogs. We did some hiking through trails a foot deep in snow. We climbed rock formations.

We got a nice campsite along a babbling creek. Its sounds are lulling us to sleep. Unfortunately a winter storm is supposed to move into the area tomorrow night so we may be looking for affordable lodging tomorrow night.

Spring Break Travels Day 1

He is risen. He is risen indeed. Alleluia.

Our day started at church remembering the resurrection of our Lord. We went a little earlier than usual and did the traditional service rather than the contemporary as we normally do. An organ and brass instruments seem fitting for Easter morning.

After lunch we finished packing the car and got on the road to enjoy our spring break week. Destination: the Black Hills. The boys have never been.

Our first (and only) stop of today was at the (in)famous Corn Palace in Mitchell. Being a late afternoon on Easter Sunday everything was closed of course, but we enjoyed seeing the murals made from grains. It was nearly 60 degrees ans the sun was out (it had been in the 30s when we left Minnesota a little after noon) so we stretched our legs a little. And we enjoyed a pb&j sandwich before getting back on the road.

We crossed the Missouri River and found an affordable hotel for the night. We hopefully have a short drive to the Black Hills tomorrow where we plan to camp the next couple of nights.

The Week

Here's how this week has played out so far:

On Wednesday my wife flew to Pennsylvania to work at her research site for 10 days. She flies home on Friday and then back out to a different venue on Sunday for three more days. So she'll be home for two out of fourteen days.

On Thursday, my class at school left for an overnight camping trip (in cabins, but no electricity or running water, so it was primitive for most of the city kids). We had two days of outdoor education. The weather cooperated, and it was nice to be outside in spring weather. My youngest son's class also was on the trip, so my oldest spend the night with friends.

Those friends invited us over for supper and a movie on Friday night, so it was nice not to have to come home after a trip and make a meal. Friends are a good thing to have.

I also discovered a cold was setting in that night. I can't tell you how many tissues I've gone through.

Saturday started with my oldest son having beginning orchestra and my youngest having hockey at roughly the same time. So I dropped of my oldest with his violin at the church where they practice, then ran my youngest over to the ice arena to get all his gear on. Then it was back to the church to finish hearing my oldest, and then back to the ice arena to finish watching my youngest play. Thankfully this was all about a mile apart at most.

Saturday was also Free Comic Book Day, so after practices were finished, we visited a few comic book stores for some new reading material.
 
Today we decided to venture out to the local May Day Parade. It's the largest in America, I'm told. It's put on by the Heart of the Beast Puppet Theater which helped volunteers make all sorts of creative masks and costumes.  It's not like anything I've ever been to before. The fresh air was good, though. And there was a fun spirit of welcoming in spring. After the long winter we've had, we need it--and after the long week of rain we've had, the sun was good. I think my youngest has a little bit of a sunburn on the back of his neck.

At church tonight I went to a session that looked at haiku as a way to pray the Psalm we were reading. The busyness of the week necessitated some good, quiet prayer time. Meanwhile, the cold is still raging. More prayer needed.
We didn't get in any good Star Wars-themed activities for Star Wars Day (May 4th--as in May the Fourth be with you--get it? terrible pun, I know, but it's nationally recognized). But the boys donned their helmets for a bedtime photo.

May the Force be with you--and me--in the week ahead.

Of Children, Frustration, And Shoeboxes

I've been having plenty of frustrating moments with Nils lately. Not a lot, but enough to know that I am not always responding in the best ways. He does a lot of not-listening. He does a fair amount of outright disobeying. He does a large amount of dawdling. Today after 10 minutes, he did not have is shoes on, and don't often have the time to sit and make sure he's doing what he's supposed to be doing, nor do I have the permission to always be late to places like work. Maybe all of this is normal for six-year olds. I really hope not.

I know I'm not responding well. His actions frustrate me more than they should. And I know he's hearing way too much negative things from my mouth than he should, too.

I was reflecting at church tonight that my focus is off. I am frustrated because he's not obeying. And that's legitimate is many ways, but I realized I don't want a kid who just obeys (as nice as that may be). There will be times in his life where he shouldn't obey--times when he needs to stand up against his peers, stand up for what is right, stand up for justice. And obedience is just an action. It's something we train dogs to do. I'm not a trainer; I'm a parent.

What I need to refocus my desire on with my children is love. That's really what I want. I want them to love me. I want them to love others. I want them to love God. Now, obedience is typically an outcome of love--but it's not the main goal. So what I need to focus on is teaching my son to love. I can't do that by getting impatient at him or yelling at him. I can do that through being patient and sowing more words of affirmation and blessing than I do frustration.

* * * * *

Today the boys and I finished making purchases and putting together shoeboxes with toys, toiletries, and clothes to send to children overseas for Christmas (and, ironically yes, the yelling over the shoe dawdling episode occurred as we were trying to leave to do this). It's something we've been doing the past three years as part of our Advent "routine" to instill a greater sense of benevolence within the boys. We want to stress that Christmas isn't about commercialism and making lists of toys we want. As they get older, I hope we can do things like volunteering at a soup kitchen.

So, we're taking conscious efforts to teach our children to love and think beyond themselves. I just need to show, model, and do it more. Children everywhere need to hear words of love spoken to them far more times than words of anger, frustration, or even impatience. Of course, "out of the heart, the mouth speaks." So the important thing to do when dealing with my children is to make sure I'm building up my heart with the same things that I want to come out of my mouth. I want to speak words of love, patience, and affirmation to my children; I need to make sure my heart is abundant with those ideas.

Of Birthdays, Elections, and Hope

Six years ago our youngest son Nils was born. There was snow in the air for the first time that fall as we drove to the hospital early that morning. It was not an easy time in our lives. My position at the Bible camp I worked at had been cut two months earlier. Opportunities for work was slim. We were about to have a second child.

But we had hope. We were in a church community that was praying for us and taking care of us. God was providing for our needs. We knew a job would come along at some point. And we knew that our new-born son was coming into a family that would love him, no matter what.


This past week Americans voted for the president, national and local leaders, and various state laws and constitutional amendments. As with most elections in the past few decades, it was ugly. Mud was slung. Division was clearly more abundant than unity.

In Minnesota were were faced with a marriage amendment which pitted those who don't want the definition of marriage to be change against those who want gays and lesbians to have the same freedoms. We had a voter ID amendment that pitted those that wanted fair, un-fraudulent voting against those who were looking out for the rights of minorities and the elderly. Many felt very strongly about both sides of both amendments. And, I believe, both sides had valid points (the outcome wouldn't have been so close to 50-50 if not). Unfortunately, we didn't look for common ground. Unfortunately, both amendments caused a lot of hurt, as well as a lot of name-calling. As did the presidential election--and every other election on the ballot.

We had months of ugly political ads. And the the election was over. The disunity didn't end. I hated the election results as much as the ads leading up to them...it's either smugness, despair, or naming segments of voters as idiots. Democracy only works if we allow people to vote their conscience with respect that we can differ. It's not easy to acknowledge that if our vote "wins," another person's "lost" and to respect them without rubbing their nose in it. We have become a nation of poor losers and arrogant winners. It seems that for a while we are going to be politically divided, rather than trying to find middle ground where we can all move forward.

In the midst of the election results, I never heard anyone mention Peurto Rico's non-binding resolution to become the 51st state. Many of the islanders want change, and at least a fair number think that becoming more fully involved as a united state, rather than a territory, would be beneficial. I hope they're right.

Nils had his whole birthday party planned out. Crafts, games, activities. He had drawn out an elaborate obstacle course to make in the yard. Then he made a 3-D model of it. He knew what he wanted for his party, and he made it happen. He also knew his friends whom he had invited and made sure it would be fun for them as well.

His world is very different than the world I grew up in. As a white male, he is in the minority in our neighborhood. His teachers are from the Netherlands, Mexico, and Somalia. He is surrounded by the inner city instead of cornfields. The future he grows up in will be different, too. Clearly the political and moral tide will continue to change over time--for good and for bad.

My hope lies not in the election or the political decisions to come. My hope is in my children and their friends. I hope they can do better than we do sometimes. I hope they can work together to find a way to bring equality and justice, righteousness and peace--and to do so while staying true to who they are and to their moral standards. I hope that just as they are able to play together as children that they can work together as adults...male and female, black and white, Christian and non-Christian.

My greatest hope is that Nils will love his Creator and find his purpose in who he was made to be. I know he loves God...I pray that it grows more deeply in him as he grows older. That he may know the Christ who loved everyone, who challenged unjust systems, and who preached repentance as well as forgiveness. That he may live out that love in bold ways.

I love you, my six-year old Nils. And I pray that you may find hope as you grow up as well.

Encountering Minnie, The Lake Monster

Adamantium Sticks and Young Boys

Tonight the boys' school had an open house at their new school building followed by a puppet performance by Open Eye Theater. We enjoyed seeing the new building, having fun, and seeing friends.

Afterward, the boys played for a while with other friends while the adults talked. At one point we saw Nils with three sticks between his fingers on each hand. I knew right away that he was pretending to be Wolverine from the X-Men comic books (Anders had checked one out at the library recently). (We did joke, however that he was pretending to be Freddy Krueger since he watches a Nightmare on Elm Street movie before going to bed each night--again, another joke.)

As Nils was playing with the other kids, he did a good job of not moving in a way that could harm someone--swinging his "claws" down instead of up and such.

They like to play superheroes. Usually it's Batman, Iron Man or Spiderman (especially the last two as we purchased costumes on sale from a store super cheap a few Halloweens ago). They like to read comic books and watch some cartoons (the only movie we've let them watch is the old Superman movie).

Superheroes, at their essence, are role models for us all. While we will likely never get bitten by a radio-active spider or experience a burst of gamma radiation, we all have the potential to do good. Superheroes are servants of the communities in which they reside. They seek to help those in need and to bring justice where there isn't any.

Of course, comic books also come with violence and other things that you don't always want impressionable young minds to interact with, but we try to find the "safer" books from the kids' section of the library. And I guess on the plus side, the action from the books leads them to active playing.

But more than that, I hope that the kids take with them the goal of making the world a better place--of serving others, of seeking justice, of righting wrongs. I hope that someday--even in the not-too-distant future--that the boys will be superheroes in their own rights. With their tender hearts (Anders loves to look out for younger kids and Nils likes to help people) they're on their way.

Nils Turns Four

Today, our youngest turned four. We set a record high temperature of 69 degrees today. Four years ago in Iowa we were driving through our first, light snowfall. A few hours later dear friends from church brought Anders to the hospital to meet his new brother. We were in the midst of being unemployed and looking for work. A few months later (after a couple heavy blizzards), we found ourselves moving to Canada. But Nils really only remembers Minnesota as his home. Before going to bed tonight (as has somewhat become a tradition), we pulled out Nils' baby book and enjoyed looking back.


We celebrated his birthday today by going to the Mall of America to take advantage of Nickelodeon Universe's free birthday wristband. It was his first real time in a theme park. He loved riding on most of the rides (the haunted house was too scary, even though they provided guns to shoot the ghosts, and the log ride was too much of a drop and too wet). He was also given a coupon book which provided a free cookie and ice cream cone later. We ran across the road to Ikea to have the birthday meal Nils asked for: a hot dog. He got to play mini golf for free--which he was really wanting to do. And we even saw Santa Claus (he was there for a photo shoot on one of the rides).

I get to spend almost every day with my son, but it was fun to get to watch him enjoy a new experience. It was fun just to celebrate. Sometimes he may test my patience, and sometimes I get upset when I keep stepping on toys that don't get picked up, but I love the kid. Thanks for the past four years, Nils. I love you.

Get It In Writing

Nils: I'm going to be Iron Man for Halloween. I'm goimg to write that down.

General Mills and Nils

Nils and I biked over to General Mills corporate offices today and had some fun exploring the sculptures on their grounds. He found his harmonica in the bike trailer, so we had some music as we biked on the way there (you can see him playing it in the first picture).

It was a nice day--better than the 90 degree days with high humidity that we've had lately--and we enjoyed the bike ride and the time together. He's been going through this phase of checking boundaries (by that I mean constantly pushing them); it was a welcome reprieve to have some time with him where he wasn't disobeying or jut not listening. Maybe he just needed some focused attention. Maybe we all do.

And Then there Were Two (Wheels)

Last Sunday I had to replace a tire on Nils' bike. It had worn through. Tires that small are impossible to find. Thankfully, a good friend from church had some extras. While replacing the tire, Nils asked if he could have his training wheels off; Anders was already expressing interest in trying to ride without his. Anders had tried last summer, but I had pushed him into it a little too much, and he wasn't confident enough to try it.

Now, they both seemed to be ready. Admittedly, I had expected Nils to be able to ride without training wheels before Anders. He moved up to a two-wheel scooter this spring and has great balance. He has the potential to be a great gymnast if he was born in a family who could afford it.

Anyway, they were both ready to try without the training wheels. And they both did remarkably well on their first attempt. Nils was actually riding down the side walk with me walking beside him, not holding on to him, as Beth drove home from work. The neighbors were impressed and thrilled that Beth got to see it. They've both been practicing some all week, and I'm trying not to push it too much with them. Nils requested his training wheels put back on this morning so he could ride without someone having to help him start and stop all the time. That'll give me more opportunity to work with Anders, anyway.

Riding a bike requires two things: confidence in yourself and trust in the person who's helping you. I suppose it requires protective gear, plenty of practice and persistence and a bike, of course. But confidence and trust are good lessons to work off.

To accomplish or succeed at anything, we need confidence in ourselves. That confidence comes when we root ourselves in the knowledge of who God created us to be. We need to build ourselves up in the fact that God loves us more deeply and more passionately that we can ever know. That keeps us humble, preventing overconfidence, yet bold, knowing that God gives us the strength to do whatever He calls us to.

We also need to trust the One who will help us do what He calls us to do. That goes without saying, but sometimes we forget (I'm including myself in this) that He empowers us to do whatever is in His will for us to do.

With practice, following God is like riding a bike, so take off your training wheels.

(And I totally have to give credit to Amy Mingo on the photos as I'm always running alongside and can never get a picture of my own taken of the boys)

Potty Beauty

Nils is one who finds beauty in everything. Today were were in restrooms in a few different stores. Upon two separate occasions, Nils declared regarding the shorter urinal he was using, "Awww, how cute!" I'm not exactly sure what makes a urinal cute, but Nils is the only one who can get by declaring it so.

It's a Smooth Ride

Nils: I'm going to ride on my Speedo bike. (I'm hoping he meant speeder, as they were playing Star Wars).

In the Eye of the Beholder

Nils: (upon seeing Miss Piggy in the Muppet Christmas special) Wow! The pig is beautiful!

Parks & Parties

We were in Iowa over the weekend at my parents' house for several days. Beth had a retreat she was at for a couple days, so the boys and I hung out with their grandparents and aunt. We headed to one of the nearby parks one afternoon (after Dad was done with fieldwork)--one I hadn't been to for a while. The boys enjoyed the old-school playground equipment (we all did, actually).

We also celebrated Nils' birthday with my family. We brought my grandma out from the nursing home.

The Birthday Party

Nils had a construction theme birthday party. Which basically just meant the cake was decorated that way. Beth did a great job making it look like a work site. And it was very tasty.

He did get some construction toys as well--and a knight dress-up set from MorMor.

It was just a small celebration: Aunt April, Uncle Wilder, Cousin Riley and our neighbors (including Charlie in the picture above with the boys). We're headed to Iowa this weekend for some more celebrating (among other things).